Constructive Suffering

[Markme]

What exactly can be constructive about feeling unpleasant emotions? Can there be such a thing as constructive suffering? Sure. Constructive suffering is like constructive criticism. Someone might criticize the way you stand when you’re up for bat. They may give you advice like bend your knees, now that is an example of constructive criticism? Yes, they are only trying to help. Constructive suffering is similar, it is meant to help you.

When you skip school because you were unprepared for the test that day you may feel guilt, or upset at yourself for what you had lack to due the night before. This is an example of constructive suffering. This memory of yours will help you later on in life when another test comes up. You will recall the way you felt last time when you were unprepared and that will motivate you to prep for the upcoming test.

There are two types of suffering: “neurotic suffering” and “existential suffering.” Existential is defined as, “Involved in or vital to the shaping of a person's self-chosen mode of existence and moral stance” (MSN Dictionary). Neurotic suffering is not all beneficial.

If it is “existential suffering” then what you are feeling is constructive and positive. However if it is “neurotic suffering” then you need to change your course of behavior. A way to do so is by asking you, how would I act if I weren’t feeling this way. Now here is the key part to it all, you must act that way. Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. once said, “Be careful what you pretend to be, because you are what you pretend to be.”

In my case, I am a shy guy. Being shy can limited my fun, and hinder my existence. This would be an example of neurotic suffering. Now when I was at church the other day, I was nervous because I am a newly found Christian and new to the church. I hesitated to go up to get Holy Commune, but I talked myself into it because I saw I was holding myself back. When I asked myself, what would I do if I weren’t shy, the answer was that I would go up and get a piece of bread. Thus I did just that and felt better about myself because of it.

Constructive suffering helps mold us into who we will become. It is important to listen to yourself, and let your brain guide you along. Examine yourself, your emotions and figure out if what you are feeling is existential or neurotic. If it is existential then take the lesson at hand, if not, change your ways.


By Nomad