I dont want help i just needed to get this off my chest ya know.
Every one i know thinks im a really happy person, they think that i am almost industructable...
But they are wrong, i cant stand being alive and every day my feeling of isolation grows. I just want to die so it will all be over. My life isnt bad, my parents dont hate me, my life is good... i just feel so disconnected from the world, yet i am a socialite and have many friends.
I feel tired and burdened by being here and every time i am in a situation that could in a worst case scenario eventuate in my death... i wish for it.
For some reason i want to get back at the world, but it has never done anything to wrong me.
I hate my stereotyped perfect life, i hate who i am and i hate what im going to become.
My life may have nothing wrong with it, but it cant be too good if i cant stand myself.
I'm not insecure, im not hating my body, i dont hate my friends, i just hate who me.
that is what suffering from depression is like. it is not always caused by events just sometimes its a mental thing x
Agree'd perhaps try seeking proffessional help or reaching out to one of your friends.
I think the major think you need to overcome is that you infact do need help, It is always the industructable things that are most fragile... if that makes sence.
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All the things we used to think were happiness, in the end were only pleasures.
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