I'm hurting so much right now... tonight has been hell. My dad is a total PHYCO. All he does is yell and bitch at us. He doesn't care at all. Yea he has bipolar but is that his excuse? his sorry azz excuse? He should have gotten help but does he NO. I can't put up with it anymore..

emeraldgirl93

I'm starting to think life's not worth living anymore, I have nothing to fight for anymore. I'm sick of being depressed i'm sick of everything...

emeraldgirl93

Everything has been shit lately, Stephine hasn't been around because her moms out of town so shes staying at a friends house. My best friend always use to lisen to me whenever i needed her and now all she cares about is TT or Flyff. I want to cut again, I'v been trying sooo hard not to think about it but i'v been wanting to cut sooo badly the past few days. I hate my parents exspeally my dad, I'm starting to get along more with my mom tho. I'm sick of all the fighting and all the yelling.

emeraldgirl93

Hi everyone, Its been awhile since I posted in my blog, I'v been busy, I'm trying to un dig myself out of the minture hole I dug for myself in 1st quarter, I NEED to pull all my grades up to A's Its one of my goals for this year to get all A's I'm starting to make more friends, I have a new friend, well a few new friends actually... stephanie, shes a softmore and she lives right next to me. I have her cell # and I was over to her house once. I feel like she can understand me better because she's...

emeraldgirl93

but... I really DO hate my life right now, all my parents do is bitch at me all day, I hate school, I have no RL friends. I'm sick of trying... seems like theres no point in trying anymore.

emeraldgirl93

emeraldgirl93

Tonight had to be my WORST night ever. I felt so awful, I was crying pretty much the whole night. All I could think about was I WANT TO BE DEAD. I HATE EVERYTHING. I'm sick of feeling like this. I know I have awsome friends that love and care about me. but there not my RL friends there only online friends I only have online friends no one in my RL cares about me. Only thing they can do is support me. I'm so sick of hurting all the time.

emeraldgirl93

Everything was so much simpler in elementry school and middle school less hw, eaiser to make friends. I'm sick of being alone.... well i'm not totally "alone" I have everyone here and jenn, jeff and zhen. Even them, they leave me out of a lot of things lately. Jenn and Jeff are gf/bf so there always hanging out together, I know and respect they need there time together. I of course manage to hurt everyone around me again... I hurt zhen because we both like each other but I THOUGHT i wanted...

emeraldgirl93

The past few days is one of those days where i'm in my downright DEPRESSED moods, I can NOT be happy no matter how hard I try. I WANT to be happy Doesn't help that i'm still sick with this stupid cough that everytime I cough I feel like I'm gonna puke. anyways i'm sure no one wants to hear me ramble on about my horrible life so I'll stop now.

emeraldgirl93